Starting to feel the need

I guess it is time to be honest with myself. I am starting to look forward to having kids. Not in the 'yeah, it will be kinda cool one day' way, but in the 'when is the soonest I can get pregnant' way. That's kind of scary. There is a no-way-no-how restriction on me at the moment as I just had an MMR jab, and if I get pregnant in the next 6 months there is a risk of birth deformities. As I say, no-way-no-how. Then the other things preying on my mind are 'stuff.' I cannot deny being ambitious, and there are some things I really want to achieve before we have kids. Would you like a list?

Things I want to do before I have kids:
- Buy a house in a nice area near good schools
- Have a job I can work from home
- Travel around Europe on motorbikes with Mr SC
- See Thailand, and a monsoon
- Learn to take nice photos

- Have a wardrobe of clothes I like

- Be in the habit of looking presentable when I leave the house

- Have a house that is decorated the way I like
- Refresh my German skills, so I can make some attempt to help my kids not be ignorant English-speakers
- Have had a few years of just me and Mr SC as a married couple

That is something of a list isn't it. Some things I am happy to strike through on the basis that it is just me being silly and conforming to society's supermum fetish, like the stuff about my wardrobe, looking presentable, home decor and German items.  Others are non-negotiable, like the house-buying bit. I really hate renting. I hate not being able to paint walls, redo the skanky bathroom tiles, rip out the kitchen, install a back boiler, fix the windows and doors and so on. I know all this can be done with kids there, because I lived through it in my own childhood.

I don't mind altering the travel bits, so that we can do them with kids. Motorbikes wouldn't be practical, but an old VW bus might be. Thailand and the like could be done with kids past toddler stage. Maybe I could narrow down the 'just us' years a bit, since we have already lived together for two years, and have at least one more on our own once we are married. (see the bit about the MMR)

The other major motivator for having kids sooner rather than later is Mr SC himself. He is 10 years older than me, and we both want for him to not be an 'old' dad. So really, we need to get ourselves in gear and work towards buying a house. Which sounds great, but there is a slight hitch there, what with Mr SC going back to college and all. A couple more years of living on my wage alone, not really being able to save, and no chance of me being able to give up my day job in order to try working from home.

I don't mean to whinge, but I am starting to get impatient, and need to remind myself why I must wait. Anyway, time to stop moaning and get on with dealing with all the stuff I need to get sorted before we get married!